Part Forty Six: "Don't Try to be the Hero"

Dear Readers:

I must say that I was more than a little surprised at the lack of interest in my kidney photos! My hardcore readers have managed to comment on the most mundane of my daily activities. But I finally give you the coveted kidney pictures and you hardly bat an eyelash. Shame on you! Has the excitement finally worn off? Have you moved onto other kidney blogs? Are you too busy dealing with your own kidney donation to comment on what some might consider "yesterday's news"? I know that you are out there. I can see you on my stat counter. Of course, I'm mostly kidding here, but where's the love? I'm getting lonely.

My grandparents finally went back to Florida sometime around the middle of last week, but I had the opportunity to speak with my Grandma via telephone on Sunday. I happened to mention that I was going back to work today and my Grandma got very serious. "Be careful," she cautioned. "Don't try to be the hero."

While I appreciate my Grandma's concern, I don't really see how going back to work is heroic. First of all, I would absolutely LOVE to never have to go back to work again. Contrary to what some might think, being a bloggin' celebrity superstar is not the most lucrative position. Not everyone can afford to take off nearly a month from work, without pay. I'm not trying to be a hero, I'm just trying to pay my rent.

Furthermore, it's not like my work is really that strenuous. I work at a UPS Store, not at UPS. It would be one thing if my job were to load heavy boxes into the backs of UPS trucks all day. Instead, I either stand around, leaning on a counter and doing nothing, or I sit on a stool and stare at a computer. Sometimes this activity is interrupted by someone who needs to drop off a prepaid return shipment, or mail a few first class letters. Granted, even this small amount of activity is more strenuous than my usual routine of sitting in chairs and playing video games. I would hardly call it heroic.

Thanks to the warnings of my doctors, my family, and you, my beloved readers, I was aware that I should probably take it easy at work the first week or so. Despite the lack of actual activity at my work, there was a good chance that I would get easily fatigued. Fortunately, I didn't really find this to be much of a problem.

I spent most of the morning sitting in my chair and relaxing before my five hours of work. My boss wasn't there when I arrived and I spent a few minutes catching up with my co-worker before I settled into my favorite leaning position. My first challenge came with the mail delivery. The veteran's day holiday on Saturday made for heavier than usual mail today, and I had to carry a rather heavy bin of mail from the counter to the mailroom. Fortunately, there was no bending over involved, and I was able to easily navigate into the back room with the heavy load. I only felt a mild strain on my abdomen as I carried the bin, but not really any pain or discomfort.

Shortly after the mail arrived, my boss returned to the store and surprised me with a cookie bouquet! YAYAYAYAYAY!!! Here is a picture of it (minus one of the cookies):



This is the second time that I have received a cookie bouquet while working at a UPS Store. The last time was in Madison, when C sent me a bouquet with dinosaur cookies. This time, the cookies were in the shapes of flowers, with the message "To Brighten Your Day!" My boss apologized that the sentiments weren't more kidney specific and we mused about what the message might've said instead. I guess they had one that said something about a "speedy recovery" but since I've been gone for quite a while, he didn't think that really applied. I suggested perhaps it should have said, "Thank you for not being off work for more than a month!" We got a good laugh out of that.

Although I had only been working at the store for a few months before my surgery, I must admit that I was a bit surprised that I hadn't already received some sort of acknowledgement from my boss. Okay... this will probably sound awful but...

I know some people only get married for the presents... and maybe some people only give kidneys for the presents... but I swear that wasn't the case! I mean, I may have fantasized that my boss would surprise me with a paid leave of absence or a hospital room full of roses... but at the very least I figured he might drop a card in the mail. Is that so much to ask for? After a few weeks of nothing, I gave up on the thought. So it was a complete surprise to see him walk in with cookies. He totally redeemed himself with sugar.

Now I feel kind of guilty for expecting something from him in the first place. Was that wrong of me? I think I need to write Miss Manners and see what she says. I know you other donors out there probably have something to say about this. Surely, I'm not the only one who imagined she would wake up from surgery in a room full of balloons, presents, and wall to wall flower arrangements. Surely, there would be groups of children gathered around my bed, singing of my bravery and heroicism while a Mariachi band played in the background and confetti rained from the ceiling. My visitors would be lined up down the hall, and the hospital would have to extend their visiting hour policy to accommodate everyone. While I drifted in and out of consciousness, drugged up but beaming from the attention, the mayor of Saint Louis would read a proclamation declaring October 25th, "SUPER-AMANDA-THE-KIDNEY-DONOR-HERO-DAY".

Maybe Grandma was right in warning me not to "try to be the Hero." She just warned me about a year too late.